reverting too quickly to before i met God .
where am i going why am i falling .
i could say i feel almost ice-like
but even ice is breakable .
inside i know im more dead than alive .
i dont know .
it feels like it doesnt matter anymore .
the people who im with @ church ,
my reason for BEING at church
praying at home , let alone outside
iono everything feels so distant .
and i dont even know if im up to fix it .