lately ive been standing on thin faith ,
little discipline & a really bleak life .
& to tell the truth , it is so exhausting .
i swear everyday i wake up ,
and the first thought is school
and stress , the things i have to do ,
the things ive already done .
so stupid . how insignificant .
i really need to
ty pauline : )
for giving me a hundred & one cups of water .
to be completely reliant & selfless feels .
amazing .
ive been listening to carrie underwood's 'so small' again .
this song gets me every time .
i am so focused on the little things ,
i stress myself so much ,
but flipping that book , listning to this song
realizing things i knew but brushed off ,
makes me feel so light & unburdened .
its amazing . really .
"After the last scene of my life flashed before me, I looked back at the footprints in the sand. I noticed that at many times along the path of my life, especially at the very lowest and saddest times, there was only one set of footprints.
This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it. “
Lord, you said once I decided to follow you, You’d walk with me all the way. But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me.”
The Lord replied, “
My son, my precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of suffering, when you could see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”
&&&
What you got if you ain't got love
the kind that you just want to give away
It's okay to open up
go ahead and let the light shine through
I know it's hard on a rainy day
you want to shut the world out and just be left alone
But don't run out on your faith
'Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sandWhat you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after allIt sure makes everything elseseem so smallIt's so easy to get lost inside
a problem that seems so big at the timeit's like a river thats so wide
it swallows you whole
While you sit around thinking about what you can't changeand worrying about all the wrong thingstime's flying bymoving so fastyou better make it count 'cause you can't get it backSometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small
Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything elseOh it sure makes everything elseSeem so small
i think
10:47 PM
2 you say
Sunday, October 26, 2008
reverting too quickly to before i met God .
where am i going why am i falling .
i could say i feel almost ice-like
but even ice is breakable .
inside i know im more dead than alive .
i dont know .
it feels like it doesnt matter anymore .
the people who im with @ church ,
my reason for BEING at church
praying at home , let alone outside
iono everything feels so distant .
and i dont even know if im up to fix it .
i think
4:32 PM
1 you say
Monday, October 6, 2008
im not sure if many of you are aware about this , my daddy fwded this email to me a few days ago . today he sent me another one following & i thought that i should share .
"Urgent prayer request. pls pray for the churches in India. Hindu extremists burnt 20 churches yest night & are planning to destroy other 200 churches in orissa tonite. BJP also planned to kill 200 pastors in the next 24 hrs. All christians are hiding in bushes. Pls pray & fwd 2 all intercessors u know so we can cry to God on their behalf. Pst Steve, Dubai" - was the email .
today i received this :



um yeah ... guys .... pray .